Killing me with kindness

I have come to the conclusion lately that sometimes I am too generous.  I hit rock bottom this weekend. I was furious with the world for life being difficult, unfair.  But I climbed back out late Sunday and realized there are little reasons as well as big to want to live life, and be thankful and joyful in it.  Maybe these are all just generalities but in this instance I don't think that makes them less true. At any rate, sometimes I kill myself over the kindnesses I offer others.  I offer them because I believe in life's beauty, but when my generosity and efforts are discarded, or unnoticed by human or fate alike its a morale killer and morale was definitely low this weekend.

My life is a carousel of shit right now, but at the same time, maybe it's a carousel of diamonds -- life's lessons are priceless after all aren't they?  And difficult situations build character.  Make great paintings.  Interesting stories to tell at the bar. . .

Look I am eating caramel delights. I feel better already.